The Children
Tom Shankland
2008

While getting together for the holidays, two families good times turn bad when their children start coming down with a mysterious illness. While at first the children are merely irritable and creepy, things soon start to take a turn for the worst after a string of small “incidents” turn in to full blown homicidal rampage. With their children develop an insatiable blood-lust for adults, the parents must decide, kill or be killed.

Kate’s review:
 I have a pretty fucked up mentality when it comes to children killers. I don’t know if anyone else shares this same sentiment with me but; I would fuck a kid up. I would. It might be my shattered moral compass that allows me to show no remorse towards the little darlings or it could just be that i’m a flat out sociopath. Either way, if it comes down to me or a kid. I’m winning. I get so enraged when I see kids running shit. I don’t care if the kid has a bazooka, I’m not going down by a 5 year olds grubby little hands.

The Children had me pissed. Which is a good thing. These little fuckers were ruthless! I almost had to respect their game purely on principle. Not only were they able to physically destroy their elders but they broke them down emotionally and mind-fucked them until all that was left was a pathetic big old adult sized brain rocking back and forth in a corner. (Not literally, but that would’ve been sweet) The great thing about the movie is the reality of it all. On a smaller scale of course, we can really relate to this behavior. I’m not saying we see kids stalking their parents with shards of broken glass, but we do see them manipulating their parents everyday into getting their way for no logical reason other than they are a cute, small, child. Fortunately for us, being a cute small child only goes so far in The Children and there comes a time where you have to fuck your kid up. Unless of course you want your kid to fuck you up in which case they will gladly dice you up and play house with your corpse. The Children is different from your previous kids movies in the way the characters are developed. The kids aren’t your Children of the Corn pure evil little shits. They possess an element of innocence even throughout the grizzliest of murders, making it even more challenging for the parents to step up and realize what has to be done. You want to hate them, or if you’re me you do hate them, but they have such a creepy mental distance you almost want to believe it’s not actually them causing the terror.
Almost.


Tom Shankland does a great job in slowly building tension without boring you or leaving you unsatisfied when the actual shit hits the fan. All the while his use of the clean white snow combined with a red blood drenched cast creates beautiful and chilling imagery. So what didn’t I like about it? Maybe i’m in a rare mood but there wasn’t any major downsides to this movie.  Sure the plot is simple but for a killer kids movie it is top notch. The Children delivers exactly what you expect but with more gore and better cinematography than you’re used too. 

With a high body count, solid killings, satisfying ending, and great directing. The Children is worth checking out.
The Children
Tom Shankland
2008

While getting together for the holidays, two families good times turn bad when their children start coming down with a mysterious illness. While at first the children are merely irritable and creepy, things soon start to take a turn for the worst after a string of small “incidents” turn in to full blown homicidal rampage. With their children develop an insatiable blood-lust for adults, the parents must decide, kill or be killed.

Kate’s review:

I have a pretty fucked up mentality when it comes to children killers. I don’t know if anyone else shares this same sentiment with me but; I would fuck a kid up. I would. It might be my shattered moral compass that allows me to show no remorse towards the little darlings or it could just be that i’m a flat out sociopath. Either way, if it comes down to me or a kid. I’m winning. I get so enraged when I see kids running shit. I don’t care if the kid has a bazooka, I’m not going down by a 5 year olds grubby little hands.

The Children had me pissed. Which is a good thing. These little fuckers were ruthless! I almost had to respect their game purely on principle. Not only were they able to physically destroy their elders but they broke them down emotionally and mind-fucked them until all that was left was a pathetic big old adult sized brain rocking back and forth in a corner. (Not literally, but that would’ve been sweet) The great thing about the movie is the reality of it all. On a smaller scale of course, we can really relate to this behavior. I’m not saying we see kids stalking their parents with shards of broken glass, but we do see them manipulating their parents everyday into getting their way for no logical reason other than they are a cute, small, child. Fortunately for us, being a cute small child only goes so far in The Children and there comes a time where you have to fuck your kid up. Unless of course you want your kid to fuck you up in which case they will gladly dice you up and play house with your corpse. The Children is different from your previous kids movies in the way the characters are developed. The kids aren’t your Children of the Corn pure evil little shits. They possess an element of innocence even throughout the grizzliest of murders, making it even more challenging for the parents to step up and realize what has to be done. You want to hate them, or if you’re me you do hate them, but they have such a creepy mental distance you almost want to believe it’s not actually them causing the terror. Almost.

Tom Shankland does a great job in slowly building tension without boring you or leaving you unsatisfied when the actual shit hits the fan. All the while his use of the clean white snow combined with a red blood drenched cast creates beautiful and chilling imagery. So what didn’t I like about it? Maybe i’m in a rare mood but there wasn’t any major downsides to this movie. Sure the plot is simple but for a killer kids movie it is top notch. The Children delivers exactly what you expect but with more gore and better cinematography than you’re used too.

With a high body count, solid killings, satisfying ending, and great directing. The Children is worth checking out.